At first I thought alcohol was to blame for their hatred. However, I quickly realized that the bigoted and hateful language and actions of my loved ones were always present in them, whether they were under the influence or not. Alcohol was just an excuse to shout these hatreds out loud. The biggest influence that my loved ones' alcoholism had on me was my belief that I would have a different relationship with alcohol use in my life. The family pattern of alcoholism had a lasting impact on me through the realization that I had a predisposition to alcoholism. To avoid becoming addicted to alcohol, I should be vigilant about